motherhood · mumlife · parent

Where it all began.

Motherhood is the greatest thing and the hardest thing.

Ricki Lake

Well this quote certainly resonates with me and I’m sure many others. I can’t say that I always wanted to be a mum because that’s not the case, for years in my late childhood and early teens I would say to my own mum that “I never want children, I want to ride a motorbike and travel.” I don’t ride a motorbike or travel and I definitely have a child. But when I found my first ‘love’ at 14 my mind had changed. Obviously, I was young, dumb and downright foolish but I knew then that actually maybe children were for me.

I studied childcare for GCSE but sadly hated the college teacher so much that I didn’t pay much attention and just about scraped a D. I started a job working in a private nursery when I was 17 and my want for children grew even more. I kept on at my mum about having one now and she obviously always persuaded me not to (which i’m eternally grateful for now). Working with them was enough for the time being and despite colleague differences I LOVED my job. Sadly that ended on bad terms, so I worked a carer for a bit but it just wasn’t the right job for me, so I started working for an NHS nursery, which I still work at now.

In this time I met my soul mate and truly the love and light of my life, Billy. We both knew we wanted children, but first we wanted to enjoy ourselves, do what we want when we want and make many precious memories together. We definitely done that!

I then sadly kept getting unwell after having glandular fever, it was as if my body had never gotten over it and I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I was so physically drained all the time and kept getting bug after bug. I had to cut down my hours at work which was hard but was very much needed. My main worry though was “will I ever physically be able to have children feeling like this”.

It was a hard few years but as I started getting better we had the talk about children and decided it was time, I came off the pill in October 2018. We had 3 more holidays before I finally fell pregnant in May 2019. Anyone, who knows me knows I’m super impatient so I know that seems like such a short time but for me it was LONG!

Pregnancy worked wonders for my Fibromyalgia, I had barely any flare ups and felt so ALIVE! I worked extra bank days at work because my body finally felt like my own. It was wonderful. I now know that this has been the case for many other women who suffer too, so they definitely should consider bottling pregnancy up and giving it to those who suffer.

Anyway, so I had a great pregnancy, and an okay birth, I suppose as well as it could go squeezing a baby out of you and our beautiful (Super) Nova was born 24.2.2020 at 18:06 weighing 7lbs 4oz. We were truly in a baby bubble. Obviously little did we know we would then have to be in a literal bubble of not being able to see anyone but it definitely made me the mother I am today and stronger than I ever thought I could be.

So there it is, where it all began. I hope this gives you a little picture of who I am. As my bio says this will probably be a lot of ramblings but I do hope it resonates with some.

Emily ♥

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